Most of the time the Australian relaxed attitude to life is refreshing after 4 decades in England, but the casual approach to spelling, grammar and foreign languages does cause me a certain amount of consternation.
The misuse and overuse of the apostrophe would make Lynne Truss apoplectic, and regarding French pronunciation there is absolutely no quarter given, with all words having a phonetic interpretation. Currently the Australian Open Tennis is being sponsored by Garnier ('Take care, Garny air' ).
Ordering a croissant in a bakery one has to resort to pointing to the item in order to be understood, or accept defeat and ask for a croo-son ( to rhyme with Tucson, Arizona). Mary and I are running a competition to see who can spot the best howlers, and it is a close run thing so far. Most cafes will serve
raison toast for breakfast, or with cream as a
desert, lovingly prepared in their state of the art
brassiere kitchens.
We have decided to open an existential cafe/bookshop called
Raisin Detre' where customers can order their
deserts while sitting comfortably on the chaise
lounges or reading the
currant events noticeboards. There are possible several locations- maybe next to the Ghandarva
Wholistic Counselling Centre in Richmond , De Ja Vu the hairdressers, or move to Orange and find somewhere near the '
Definately Different' gift shop. Or we could position ourselves next to the skincare and beauty salon below:
It may be advisable to be close to a laundrette...as long as poor terry does not need washing:
However we have decided on a signature dish
desert for the A'La'cart menu.